Struggling with Guilt

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Struggling with Guilt

“I could never put my mother in a nursing home.”

“Don’t you feel guilty having strangers take care of your mother?”

“I’ve heard horror stories about what goes on in those places.”

At first I felt shamed by people’s reactions.  Then I felt the need to defend myself.  Following that, I was angry that I felt the need to defend myself.   

If you are like me, you struggled with your decision.  It wasn’t one that you made lightly.  It’s not as though I dropped my mother at the door with a paper bag of belongings and scurried away, leaving no contact information.

If you are caring for your loved one at home, I respect you for your commitment.  I'm not in a position where I can care for Mom on a full time basis.  So I spent months visiting different places with Mom until we found the best accommodations for her.  I visit frequently, sometimes with no advance warning, to monitor the care she receives.

People who aren’t in your situation will try to make you feel guilty, no matter which choice you make. Don’t trust their opinions.  They don’t matter.  Trust in God and yourself to help you make the best decision for both you and your loved one.


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